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The Struggle is Real: How to Find Yourself Again

Are you feeling lost? Hello? Lovely. 

If you’ve ever felt like you’ve lost yourself—that nothing feels right and life is overwhelming—then know you are not alone. Many of us, especially women, experience this confusing yet debilitating feeling as we navigate our health and life challenges. Whether it’s the teenage years loaded with hormones or the menopause transition, sometimes managing fluctuating hormones (and roles) can feel like a full-time job. But don’t fret—there is hope to be found; it’s time to regain control of ourselves and awaken the best parts of ourselves! Here are some easy steps for getting closer to finding your true self again.

 

How are you?

I often hear people say, “Dr. Purcell, I don’t know who I am anymore. I feel like I lost myself.” Then I will listen as they unfold the story, which will most of the time contain stressful moments here and there.

This topic revolves around a place we all get to at one point or another—a place of feeling, not yourself, feelings of inadequacy, a disconnect between the mind and the body. Perhaps you’re feeling lost right now, wondering where YOU went. Maybe you lost a relationship, lost a loved one, lost a job, or lost yourself in the process of taking care of others.

The list of stressors that can create a situation like this goes on. The bottom line is that you don’t feel like YOU anymore. Often, we stop doing the things that used to bring us joy. Life creeps in, and suddenly you feel like everything is out of control. 

There could be a feeling of inadequacy as a mother, a wife, or a daughter. People, mostly women, tell me they feel like they struggle mentally and emotionally just to keep up. Eventually, this leads to this quasi-depression.

 

“Why bother?” 

“Just go eat the pizza.”

“Stop cooking.”

 

We all experience a lack of motivation from time to time. When this happens, it can be easy to feel disconnected and frustrated with ourselves. This can lead us to give up on activities that were once beneficial for us, such as exercise or pursuing our passions. 

 

Reroute 

Adapting to new conditions can often leave us feeling a tad disoriented. Take, for example, the delightful chaos that comes with transitioning from cozy remote work to bustling office life.

The key is to reprioritize yourself along with whatever changes are in the new routine. In other words, when your routine changes, you should rethink your self-care.

For example,

Are you sleeping? If not, how can you get yourself to sleep again? Let’s rework the routine. 

What about exercise? Where in your current schedule can you fit in 20 minutes of exercise? 

Are you skipping meals? Do you need to meal prep ahead of time so you can feed yourself better? 

These are not luxury items. These are necessities to help you feel sane and balanced. The only person you can control is yourself. Let’s go ahead and flex that autonomy muscle.

For the 24/7 hustlers, do you ever feel like work is hogging the spotlight? It seems like the off button on that computer is getting dustier by the day, huh? Let’s do something radical: set your own “closing time.” Log off and truly clock out instead of entering that neverending rabbit hole of tasks.

Before you say “yes” to more commitments, take a breath, weigh the pros and cons, and don’t be afraid to use that mysterious two-letter word: an almighty “NO.” Delegate, people! Share the load and let others be accountable buddies for their tasks. You’re not Atlas, so quit shouldering the weight of the world and save your sanity while you’re at it.

 

Quality Time is a Must 

What would be the result of these changes?

This would mean finally having some free time back for yourself, which in turn frees up energy and creativity, which are important items in the quest for a better life. 

“I want a better quality of life,” is what most people tell me. Craving that VIP lifestyle upgrade? You’re not alone, my friend. Picture this: conquering the workday like a champ, only to return home and slip into your cozy PJs, transforming into a screen-gazing zombie. Does that sound like a victory to you?

Where’s the quality time with your partner? 

What about an after-dinner walk? 

 

Let me in on you a little secret if you’re feeling lost right now. I want you to try reprioritizing the top three things in your life. That way you can focus on what you are absolutely committed to and loosen up the reins and just delegate the rest.

 

Prioritize 

My priorities are my health, my marriage, and my spirituality.

When things get busy, I remind myself of my priorities, and then I can pick and choose from there. 

Feeding my family delectable and nourishing meals is my ultimate love language, and surrendering that privilege to someone or something else? Perish the thought! Grocery shopping, food prep, cooking, juicing, and healthy baking—I love it all! This may be partly because I’m half Italian and I grew up believing food equals love. It is also because I know, being a naturopathic doctor, that the wrong foods cause inflammation and disease. 

The eternal conundrum: to clean or to cook? While I’m certainly capable of transforming a home into a sparkling abode, the siren call of a nutritious breakfast tends to win me over, whisk and all!

Think about the things that are important to you. Cooking and making food can take a lot of time, but it is important to me. I don’t mind doing it because it is worth my time and energy.

 

Women’s Generosity 

I’ve been working with women for 20 years now, and I’m continuously struck by just how strong and generous we are with our abilities and our time. I find myself regularly reminding women to be compassionate and generous with themselves. The grace you spread so freely is also available to you.

Pour some of that grace into reworking your top three priorities to help you refocus. As women, we nurture by nature. We enjoy giving, sharing, and connecting. When we give selflessly and neglect ourselves, we pour every last drop of what we’ve got out, and we end up depleted. 

By resetting the boundaries in your life, especially those revolving around health, which includes personal time, sleep, exercise, and food, you’re able to fill up your own internal gas tank and have more to give. It’s a well that never runs dry.

I don’t want you to just survive. I want you to thrive. If you know that you’re in survival mode right now and you need help but don’t know where to start, I’m glad you’re here. Find me on the web

All in all, when you feel like life is snowballing into a confusing mess, it’s important to pause, take a moment to yourself, and prioritize what matters most: YOU! Everything else falls into place if you treat yourself with compassion. Remember to reroute your energy into activities that allow for personal growth and exploration. Quality “me time” does wonders for regaining confidence or finding a new direction in life with clarity and gratitude. Seek out other women who are generous with their knowledge and fuel your journey with their perspectives as well. And, of course, if self-discovery seems difficult and overwhelming beyond your current capabilities, reach out to the experts! We believe self-exploration should come from within, but we recognize that there might be moments completely out of our control. In moments of uncertainty or desire for change or freedom, please know that support is available and that we are here for you every step of the way. If these words have resonated with you on any level today, join us by scheduling a discovery call, because heaven knows the struggle can be real, but being found again can spark inner peace and joy once more.

 

Feeling lost in the whirlwind of self-doubt? Desperate to navigate your way to inner confidence? Let’s embark on this profound journey together! Schedule a free discovery call with our insightful team, and let’s unravel the mysteries of your uncharted emotions. Together, we’ll concoct a potent potion tailored just for you!

 

Oh, and before you go, don’t forget to join our league of extraordinary humans in our Private Facebook Group. Join in and step into a world of support and encouragement!

 

DISCLAIMER:  The information in this email is not intended nor implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. All content is for general informational purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/health professional 

Dr. Andrea Purcell

A trusted and well-respected Naturopathic Doctor, Dr. Purcell has been in private practice for over twenty years. Dr. Purcell is a published author and has a women’s specialty practice for hormone balancing, weight loss, mystery illness, and gastro-intestinal concerns. Dr. Purcell assists her patients by identifying the underlying cause of disease and removing obstacles that impede the body's natural ability to heal. Drugs and surgery are used as a last resort. She believes that increasing health on the inside shines through to the outside.